Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Eat, Drink and be Merry

Now is the time to have some fun, because radio minister, Harold Camping, has announced that May 21, 2011 will definitely be the day of judgement and the Rapture!  Having missed the date before, he is absolutely sure that he is right this time.  It will be interesting to see if he is right.. and that billions of the world's population who have not accepted his version of belief will be assigned to the burning fires of hell.

I saw a television shot of a couple who have quit their jobs, taken their kids out of day care, and given away all of their belongings, to get ready for the Rapture.  I'm told that there are thousands more just like them.

Meanwhile, life goes on.. however short it may be for us infidels.

01.  Ecological Travel Discount

The Week magazine reports that a brothel in Germany is offering discounts to customers who arrive by bicycle.   (Yes, I know.. that could be fodder for a lot of off-color jokes.)

02.  Mispunctuation.

The entertaining and enlightening book Eats, Shoots and Leaves mentions a classic example of mispunctuation the comparison of two sentences:

A woman, without her man, is nothing.

A woman: without her, man is nothing.

Quite a difference, right?

03. Mispunctuation

Another example from Eats, Shoots and Leaves:

Leonora walked on her head, a little higher than usual.

Leonora walked on, her head a little higher than usual.

04. The Stock Market in Retrospect

From an article in 2007:

"The Dow is near 14,000 today, a fivefold increase from 20 years ago..(this) number seems high when you look backward. But we believe it's likely that number will seem quite low to investors in the future."

Well, today, four years later, after an almost unbelievable "hit" the Dow was "up" to 12,700.  At least it is going back up again.

05.  Fertile ancestors

From a New Yorker article: "In 1800, the firtility rate among American women was about seven, life expectancy was under forty, and the median age of the population was sixteen."

"Today (2011) the fertility rate is barely two, the average American can expect to live to nearly eighty, and the median age of the population is thirty-six and rising."

My Grandparents had 15 children; one of my great-grandfathers had eleven children; his father had eleven children; his brothers each had eleven or more children. Of course, they lived in the country and needed more farmhands.

06.  Mayflower Sports

Plymouth Colony's William Brewster  (one of my ancestors) named one of his sons Wrestling.  I always wondered why.  In the New Yorker article quoted above, it was mentioned that Wrestling Brewster's name was short for "wrestling with God."  I guess I'll have to search the Bible for that reference.


07.  Study Result.. 1

A Dutch study found that people with full bladders make better decisions.  (Better than what?)

08.  Study Result.. 2

An English study found that chimps laugh at things that are not funny.  (Just like humans who watch sitcoms?) 

09.  Whew!

Teunis Tenbrook (Rotterdam, the Netherlands) was ejected from his college because he had stinky feet.  He was a philosophy student and his fellow students and teachers said they could not concentrate on philosophical issues because of the stench.  Teunis filed suit and a judge ruled that he could return to school and the professors and other students would just have to hold their noses and bear the smell.

10.  Stick-em-up!

Arizona may have already have designated the Colt single-action Army revolver as the "State gun."
Utah may have already designated the Browning M1911, as it's "State gun."

Which State is about to name the "pop gun" as their "State gun?"

11.  EMAIL Sickness

In The Week Contest for 3/18/11, Morton Ginsberg suggested a new malady:

CEFS (Compulsive E-MAIL Forwarding Syndrome)

"In which people feel compelled to forward notes, jokes, or articles of miniscule importance to everyone on their mailing list."

12.  Nikita

Fifty years ago, Kruschev visited the United States and said: "We will bury you!"  Well, you see what happened.

While here, Mr. Kruschev was most impressed with Railroad Station lockers.. saying there was no such thing in Russia.

Mr. Kruschev became very upset when he wasn't allowed to visit Disneyland.  The Sun Paper in Baltimore had the headline:  K BLOWS TOP!