It's cold and snowy outside!

Hi.. meet SuZee, our Siamese cat. SuZee was found in a barn, the survivor of an attack by some kind of "varmint". She spent the weeks that she should have been with her mama, living with two dogs who let her have some food if there was any left in their bowls after they had theirs, and who apparently terrorized her. But, she was able to hold her own in some scuffles and even pushed one of the dogs out of his bed and slept there in relative safety.

We were given SuZee as a free gift and she has been a joy to us for almost two years. I especially like that she hasn't realized the range of noises that she could create. Now, she has only a small "meow" and a few other soft sounds. Elaine has tried to teach her the "AARP AARP" song that she used to sing with her former Siamese cat named BufFee. No success yet.. thank heavens!

SuZee does make a unique sound whenever she see a bird perched on the topmost part of the neighbors' roof. I wonder if this is an in-bred mannerism developed over the years in Siam when these cats were guardians of the temples. Yes.. she is warning us that something is desecrating the temple next door.

OK.. time for another dozen observations.

01. Graduation: My beautiful granddaughter, Bridget, graduated from Towson University last week. She is the first grandchild to get a Bachelor of Arts degree. I hope that her success will motivate my other grandchildren to continue their educations.

02. Red heads. Bridget has beautiful red hair. So does AnnE in the movie, Anne of Green Gables. Elaine and I watched this 3 1/4 hour flick last night. It was filmed in beautiful Prince Edward Isle, Canada, and is a monumental tear-jerker. (I defy you to watch it without blubbering!)

I visited PEI a number of years ago and feasted on some of the most delicious seafood I have ever had (outside of New Bedford, of course).. I understand a bridge has finally been built to get to the island. When I went, I spent five hours waiting my turn to get on the ferry. But PEI certainly was worth it, despite the fact that they monopolized on the fame of the book.

Folks.. forget about a European trip. Visit Canada. There is so much to see there.. and you can do it in your own automobile.

03. Where's the Rev? For some time now, I have been trying to find tapes of the shows of Reverend Ike, my favorite preacher. You remember his motto: "I've got what it takes, to take what you've got." One of the few preachers that I have met who were not hypocrites. If anybody knows how to find such tapes, please let me know. I gave away all my BetaMax tapes and I had some of his shows taped on them.. I wish I had kept them.

04. Deep thought: Stephen Hawking says that God did not create the universe. He says that the Big Bang was inevitable and didn't need any help.

05. Thieves in high places: In Greenbelt, Maryland, a Federal employee was found guilty of obtaining over $600,000 in erroneous disability benefits. Also in Maryland, an official at the Maryland Legal Aid Bureau stole over a million dollars from court orders.

Now, if that is almost two million dollars being stolen just in a small area of Maryland, there probably are other thefts going on throughout the U.S. by people in positions of trust. (Of course, if there were no scumbags, thieves and scammers at work, who would be able to afford those multi-million dollar homes that are advertised? Oh, that's right, I forgot about the lawyers.)

06. Grades? Letter grades are now being given to automobiles, based on fuel economy and tailpipe emissions. .. I have been buying groceries and prescriptions at the Giant grocery store in Westminster, Maryland, for several years, and now they have a program where a percentage of money savings is given for Shell gasoline, based on the amount of money spent in that store. Recently, I have had 30 cents a gallon taken off one of my gas fill-ups and 40 cents a gallon taken off another one. I think its a good deal. I wonder why other stores are not copying the program?

Hey.. I remember when gasoline cost 16 cents a gallon. At that time, I had a 1935 Chevrolet with bald tires and broken wheel bearings. I could fill up for $2, whenever I could spare that much money, which wasn't too often. Luckily, I could coast downhill the mile from my house to the high school. (Coming home was the problem.)

Also, my future spouse lived three miles away and by a judicious usage of coasting and light gas usage, I could use very little gas to get to her house and back.

07. Calendars: Many people are are concerned that the world will end in 2012. They base this on some old predictions which failed to take into consideration calendar changes.

I read somewhere that there was a calendar change in the year 1750. The day after September 2nd became September 14th. Crowds of people rioted, demanding: "Give us back our 11 days!" I can't find a reference to this, but if you are interested in calendar changing, please check out:

http://www.suite101.com/content/the-calendar-change-of-1752-a141775

08. Prayer heals all? A French priest, mad because of the expulsion of gypsies, said: "I pray, I beg your pardon, that Mr. Sarkozy has a heart attack."

Another person who wasn't happy about the expulsion was EU Justice Commissioner Vivviane Reding who called it "a disgrace" as well as something she "thought that Europe would not have to witness again after the second World War."

09. Poor Ming: My Snapple diet drink bottle cap says: "The oldest living animal ever found was a 405 year old clam named 'Ming.'" After all those years, he was dug up, and died during the assessment of his age!

(Hey.. look it up in Wikipedia if you think I'm kidding you.)

10. Marriage of convenience? A marriage announcement in a June 2010 edition of the Carroll County Times reads: (married) Carroll County Department of Social Services and Michael E. Francis, of Hanover, Pa., June 15.)

11. Crooked banks? A recent Harper's Index says that the number of Wall Street banks so far which have been tried on criminal charges related to the financial crisis is 2. It also says that the number of banks which have been acquited is also 2.

12. Honoring our veterans? Harper's Index also says that an estimated 2,266 U.S. veterans under the age of 65 died in 2008 because they lacked health insurnace.

So that I won't leave you completely depressed.. let me tell you the words on a birthday card I received from my late friend, Bob Whisenand: "If you think I sent you this card just because it's your birthday... you're wrong! ... it's also out of respect for the elderly!"

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Bieber Fever, etc.

01. Bieber Fever: Mr. Bieber came to the Maryland State Fair yesterday and you would have though they were giving out free fifty dollar bills. This 16 year old guy has all the eleven year old girls yelling and screaming like the Bobby Soxers did for Frank Sinatra in the 1940's (yes, I was alive then!)

One interviewer asked a Bieber fan how she liked his singing. She said: "He's cute!"

Frank Sinatra's voice lasted almost to the day he died at age around 80, I think. Let's see what Bieber's voice does in the next few years. He seems like a nice clean-cut kid, and his popularity will probably just grow..

I hope everyone also gets a chance to listen to the 10 year old female finalist on America's Got Talent. This is a kid with a Diva's voice range. She should be a spectacular super star someday.

http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/38667257


02. Car stuff: I'm typing some of this while waiting for Toyota mechanics to do the 10,000 mile maintenance on my Rav4. I love that car. I bought the 100 year maintenance offering, so I should not get charged anything for my 5,000 visits until the year 2109.... at least that what the fine print on my contract says.. maybe.. I guess I need to buy a magnifying glass to make sure.

03. Tolerance: In my last blog entry, I wrote about a Florida pastor scheduling a Koran burning session. I just read in Time magazine that this will take place on 9/11. The pastor argues that Jesus would burn the Koran because "it's not holy." Now, everybody in Afghanistan is cursing the US and Obama.. why do they think that our President is condoning the burning?

04. Jokes: As some of you know, I started a new blog that will contain jokes and puns and humorous items that I have been collecting for many many years. I've already had some comments on my first issuance. "Cheesy.", "Fun to read.", "Childish", "Funny." ,"Go for it."

So, I guess I will continue it. If interested and a glutton for punishment, visit

http://joevaughansjokes.blogspot.com/

05. Species: Today, my SNAPPLE diet tea cap had the following message:


"Manhattan Island was once home to as many different species as Yellowstone National Park."

I showed the message to Elaine, and she had the very same response as I had, namely:

"It still is."


06. New Jersey Perps: Did I mention the one-legged thief who broke into a New Jersey shoe store and left some boxes on the floor with just right shoes? He was easy to catch.



Or the bicycle-riding crook who wore a Nixon mask? Another easy catch for Trenton cops.



07. Birther: By now, you must have heard of that "bright light" Army Officer who refused deployment to Afghanistan because he said that President Obama is not legally his Commanding Officer, because he wasn't born in the United States. He says he wants to see the "real" birth certificate. (A judge threw out his defence as idiotic.) I wonder how he got to be an officer?


08. Ugh! Disgusting sign seen in a men's rest room:


"Please do not drop paper towels in the urinals. They turn yellow when we dry them out, and some people do not like to use them."


09. Savage breast? An English headmaster punishes his students in detention by forcing them to listen to classical music!



Today, a radio announcer mentioned that there are people who die every day who have never heard the beautiful music of Beethoven. Or Mozart!!!!! I wonder if they teach classical music in school these days. My 7th grade teacher taught us how to read music and how to enjoy classical music. My mother had already instilled in me a love for the light classics, but listening to the masterworks opened my mind to a wonderful new world. So, I learned to like Bach and Beethoven. And then, later in life.. Mozart and Mahler!

10. Toot! We missed it! July was National Baked Beans Month.

11. SuZee TV: Did I mention that our cat watches TV with us. The other night, we watched two Netflix movies and she didn't move from her perch on a table between us and the TV. She watches TV very intently. She likes a lot of action and conversation. The news bores her and she doesn't like some of the cop shows that Elaine likes (even though they have lots of action).


12. Spice: Some of my Toastmasters friends sent me lists of things to do to make life more interesting. I thought that you might like to learn some of them.


Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "IN".


Everytime anybody asks you do do something, ask if they want fries with that.


In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sexual favors."


Instead of walking, skip.


Married men, everytime you see a broom, yell: "Honey, your mother is here."



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10.

Weekly Dozen @ March 20, 2010

Happy Spring! It is a beautiful 70 degree day here in Maryland where our weather goes from below freezing to Summer heat in a matter of days.

Lots of stuff going on today.. the Senate Rules Committee is getting ready to do their thing about the Health Reform Bill.. the robins are pulling skinny worms out of the moist ground.. the Mt. Airy, Maryland, St James Church now has two of our old television sets and 15 old telephone sets for recycling.. I delivered a lot of my beer making material to my son-in-law John so that he can make more of that wonderful brew.. and here is/are a dozen of things to think about. (Those tricky collective nouns! English must be a very tough language for foreign speakers to learn.)

01. Japanese. Speaking of foreign languages, every day recently comments have been posted on some of my blog entries, and most of those are in Japanese. How did they know that I am right now trying to learn to read their language? (It is an amazing experiece just to find out the history of each ideogram.)

Since I can't read the language yet, I used Google translator on one comment. The result, unfortunately, was unintelligible. So, maybe I'm dealing with some nuts, or I just don't know how to interpret Google's translation. I'll try again later.

02. Irish stuff: A leprechaun museum has been opened in Dublin, or so I've heard. Last year, I submitted a picture I took at Ocean City, Maryland, of a double rainbow. When I saw the phenomenon, I immediately tried to find the end of each to see if it was true that there were pots of gold there, hidden by those spritely elves that the Irish know exist. No luck, so I took a picture instead. It was a pretty good picture and was published in Creative Expressions. (When I learn to post a picture to a blog, I will add it.)

Faith.. and can ye tell me what beautiful green-colored Country is the richest in the world?

Why of course, it's Ireland, whose capitol is always Dublin.

The first time I heard that, I laughed so hard I fell out of my high-chair and spilled my Irish oatmeal.


03. Facebook: The Italian police have just found and arrested Pasquale (a famous crook) by reading his Facebook entries and profile.

Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me says that there is a new Mafia social network site called Scarface Book.

04. Postal Delivery: I've been following the Postmaster General's recent testimony to the Senate on cost-cutting efforts. He wants to cut out mail delivery on Saturday. One of his reasons is because people don't really get much mail on that day anyway.. probably an average of only 3 pieces of mail. I just retrieved the mail from my mailbox, and it is Saturday.. there were 19 pieces of mail. I guess I am above-average. (Garrison has always said that I was.)

05. Announcements: Apparently, people in New York are complaining about emergency loudspeaker announcements being unintelligible. I would have thought that they knew that already.. haven't they ever tried to put in an order at a fast food drive in lane?

06. Q-Tips: Our Siamese cat, SuZee, has been provided with lots of catnip-filled cat toys. Does she play with them? No. Instead, she plays with Q-Tips. She wrestles with them, carries they around like they are prey, and vigorously seeks them out from wherever we hide them. We have given up.. she always finds them. Elaine thinks we should open a business selling them as cat toys. We could become rich maybe.. of course, we would have to pretty them us somewhat and make sure that the Q-Tip people did not sue us.

07. Fighting: This week I learned that there is a lady who teaches "Cane Fu" fighting. She teaches senior citizens how to defend themselves with their cane. She presented her program at a recent local Expo, but somehow, I missed it. I don't carry a cane anyway and I try to keep away from dangerous areas, as everyone should.

I did hear about a church somewhere near that sponsors violent fighting matches by their congregants so they can learn how to defend themselves in the real violent world. (I thought you were supposed to turn the other cheek.)

08. Government Work: Millie Parsons retired a while ago after serving 59 years with the FBI.. during that time, she never took one hour of sick leave. Somehow, she found time to become a champion ballroom dancer.

(I believe that Lil Steinhorn still holds the record for the longest work for the Government. She worked most of the time for the Social Security Administration in the Baltimore area. On the day she retired, she showed up at the Social Security Alumni Association office and volunteered for work. Lil passed away in 2009. She was over 90 years old.)

09. Texas Interview: Some folks have wondered what is in the latest schoolbooks in Texas.

Interviewer: "Hello, young man. May I ask you a question?"

Texas kid: "Yes, maam."

Int: "Who was Thomas Jefferson?"

Kid: "I don't know maam, was he in a TV show?"

Int: "Isn't he mentioned in your school history book?"

Kid: "No, maam.. and I just finished the whole book in class."

Int: "Do you know who wrote the 'Declaration of Independance?"

Kid: "Oh, yes, maam.. then you must mean Jefferson Davis, who was a hero at the Alamo and later tried bravely to get us independance from a tyrant."

Int: "Did you study about evolution in your classes?"

Kid: "You must mean revolution."

Int: "No, I mean the study of the origin and advancement of life."

Kid: "Oh yes, maam. We studied all about the Garden of Eden in our book."


10. Notch Babies: Well they're at it again. Brown government-looking envelopes are being mailed to senior citizens asking for donations so that they can lobby Congress for some money to make up for the reason they are "Notch Babies".

In a nutshell, years ago, Congress made a mistake in a Social Security benefit formula for a couple of months.. and some people have gotten a larger monthly benefit than people before or after them. If Congress voted to give money to those that came on Social Security right after the more-money persons.. they would have to then give money to all of the ones thereafter.. this would immediately bankrupt the US Government.. and Congress ain't goin' to do it! So.. save your own money and don't contribute to this scheme!

I brought this out as a SCAM to my fellow TRIAD members Thursday, and was informed, rightly, by one of the Police Officers in attendance, that this is not really a scam. It is just another way for unscrupulous people to say they are going to lobby for something that will not take place, while taking donations from lots of senior citizens who can't afford to donate.

My uncle Allen sent these folks lots of money. He passed away in 2009, as did many of the people who were affected by this. Apparently, there are still enough of these folks alive to make this a lucrative ploy.

But, because they will run out of "clients" in a few years, they are now recruiting other "notch babies". In fact, I got a letter this week, naming me as one who would be in the "notch" universe. Guess what? I do not get Social Security. And, I am also no where near old enough to be included in this universe.

I'll bet that these scumbags are now buying mailing lists of any and all senior citizens in an attempt to milk some more money out of the gullible.

11. Parachuting bears: Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me mentions that someone has come up with a great solution for finding Osama Ben Laden. Parachute bears down from planes over Afghanistan or Pakistan. Bears are known for being great trackers and would go into the caves and come up with their prey. One might ask how bears would like to be put into a parachute.. which would have to self-destruct on landing.. also, who would train the bears.. Russians are good at training bears, but they, like Alexander the Great and others since, no longer want to have anything to do with Afghanistan.

12. Lunch?: Can this be true? As a guy was sitting in his car, he felt the car shake violently. Upon investigation, he found a bulldog consuming one of his tires. After being unsuccessful in stopping the dog, he gave up and watched as the dog consumed another of his tires and also half of one bumper. Finally, I guess someone shot the dog. I'm not sure of this and I need to investigate.. it sounds fascinating. Was the car a formerly accelerating Toyota? A recalled Honda? Was this really a stunt dog for a movie filming? Was this a CIA training session for an Afghanistan military secret weapon, like the parachuting bear? Perhaps that is what happens when the bear lands on the ground, it seeks out Taliban or Al Quida vehicles and like the bulldog, tears them to bits. ???

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Lucky and our first Zuke

My laptop stopped working and the only thing that is working quickly on my desktop is blogspot.com, so I will do another blog, Today I will talk about my Tuxedo Cat, Lucky (alias Luciano, Houdini, de Tuxedo) and also about our first Zuke.

I think that it is Larry the Cable Guy who tells about his dog that has only three legs, is blind and deaf. His name is "Lucky".

Well, my cat "Lucky" is also not so lucky right now. He has hyperthyroidism and is pulling out all of his fur. He looks like he has male pattern baldness. Some parts of his body have no fur and Lucky walks around with fur hanging out of his mouth.

When he was diagnosed with hyperthyroidism, the vet gave us a liquid to give to the cat. Lucky did not like that and after he chewed up my arm pretty badly we gave up on the liquid. The vet gave us some pills instead and Elaine found a wonderful thing in her effects.. its called a "pill popper". I grab Lucky and hold his paws while Elaine "pops" a pill down his gullet. It works.

Every morning I get out the vacuum cleaner and suck up the black fur deposited all over the house. Some of it embeds itself in the cheap wall-to-wall rug that we mis-ordered before we moved in.

Did I tell you about the derivation of Lucky's names? (All my cats have been named Lucky as far as I'm concerned even if other people in the house have given them other names. My late spouse called my prior cat "damn cat!" Elaine calls this cat "Kitty Kitty".)

I used "Luciano" because when I got him, his crying sounded like Pavarotti. I used "Houdini" because he learned to open locked doors. "De Tuxedo" is of course a name given to all black and white cats that look like they are preparing to go to a wedding.

Lucky has a companion: Su-Zee. I'm sure I have talked about this Siamese fireball before.

Yesterday, we picked our first zucchini from our balcony garden. It was about 5 inches long and we cut it up and mixed it into scrambled egg, as a mini-melange. Elaine ate some slices raw beforehand and said that it was the best she had ever tasted. The melange was delicious and we are looking forward to more zukes. There certainly are plenty of flowers on the plants. Elaine's daughter, Emily, says that you can fry up the blossoms. We'll have to try that.

Our tomato plants are all starting to burst forth with little tomatoes.. even our hanging tomato plant holder has a few flowers. For some reason, we are not having as good luck with the hanging holder as some of our neighbors. I look at their holders and I see large amounts of greenery hanging down. We have a few light green twiggs with brown leaves. Maybe I will pull the thing apart and put in a new plant, if I can find one now that tomato plants are being pulled because of the "blight."

Next year, Elaine wants to ask the Village for a small plot of land on which to plant some corn. So, in my old age I will become a farmer again. What about that "old rocking chair" time?

Lucky in a Tuxedo

My Tuxedo cat, Lucky (alias: Luciano Houdini de Tuxedo) began to pull his fur out last week. We took him to the vet and found that he has hyperthyroidism, a rather common malady for middle age cats.. he's around ten years old.

Pulling fur out is one symptom of hyperthyroidism. Another symptom is weight loss, and he has lost five pounds since September.. this is quite a weight loss for a cat who weighed 16 pounds.

What do we do about this? We could remove part of his thyroid gland surgically, subject him to chemotherapy, or treat him with a prescription drug called methimazole. We decided, of course, to do the drug and since it might be impossible to get him to swallow a pill, the vet melted it down into a tuna-flavored liquid. We give it to him twice a day by means of a syringe. I hold him tight and Elaine opens his mouth and squirts the stuff in. He does not like this very much and kicks and scratches with all of his paws. Luckily, at least for now, we had the foresight to have his claws cut down while he was at the vets.

Unfortunately, after we started to get ready to begin the medication program, the vet let us know that he has a mild infection as well. We got an anti-biotic for him in liquid form and now we get to squirt him twice as much. The anti-biotic does not taste as good as the tuna flavored medicine and this adds to his discomfort. However, if all goes well, we may be able to discontinue the anti-biotic when the bottles get empty.

We have now been treating Lucky for two days and thought that we might see some quick results, but when we came home tonight we were greeted by a cat with a bald spot on the side of his stomach. Poor kitty.

My granddaughters Bridget and Kaitlin helped me pick Lucky out at the "pound". (I had recently lost my wife and was very lonely. The girls felt that having a pet would make me feel less lonely, and that became true.) He was the quietest cat in the whole building. While the kittens were running around raising the devil, he sat there like a New York Public Library lion surveying the chaos. At that time, he was a TV star.. his picture was being broadcast on Carroll County Maryland cable TV, during an ad for the Humane Society.

Lucky did not then, and not now, enjoy automobile rides. On the way home from the "pound" he made sure that he threw up all over the place. Once "home" he did not treat me as a friend. My arms and legs were a mass of scratches and bites for some time. However, by being very kind to him, even when I would have really wanted to strangle him, he came to tolerate me, and eventually become my good friend.

I named him Luciano Houdini de Tuxedo because of the following reasons: The sounds that he made at first, while he was being a bit uncooperative, sounded a lot like Luciano Pavarotti, and one night when I relegated him to a downstairs room so that I could sleep undisturbed, I was awakened at 3 am by his crying.. he was in my bedroom! How did he accomplish that when I had carefully closed the door tightly on the room he was in? This remained a mystery for some time until I saw him stretch himself up to the doorknob one day, turn the knob with his paws, and open the door! Hence his middle name of Houdini. His last name was given to him because he is indeed a black cat, with a white cravat and white shoes.

I call him Lucky for short.

A few years ago, he met Elaine's Siamese cat, Buf-fee. Besides a few hisses now and then and an occasional bop on the head when Buf-fee got on his nerves, they got along rather well. When Buf-fee passed away, I do believe he grieved for her.

One year ago, another Siamese cat came to live with us: Su-zee. This was (and still is) a wound-up energetic kitten/cat, probably related to a Meer-Cat.. from the way that she perches on her hind legs to survey the terrain. Su-Zee, at first, terrorized Lucky 25 hours a day. She would lay in wait for him to pass by and then jump on his back. I think he tolerated it because she was a kitten (whose mother had been killed in a barn by a "varmint" and therefore had not learned some basic cat politeness.)

However, after a few months, Lucky felt that it was time to let her know that he was the alpha cat in the household. Instead of letting her chase him and jump on him all the time, he now took the initiative once in a while to let her know who was the boss. She then gave in and they now have a kind of truce. Sometimes she jumps and teases him, and sometimes its the other way around.

Anyway, we want to make sure that Lucky recovers quickly because he is a vital member of our family and we love him.