I need to take a break from the frustrating fun of preparing my 2010 Income Tax returns. At the moment, I haven't decided whether I need to get a tax date extension or not. By doing it last year, I had to pay a penalty.. not much, but irritating. Why does the tax law have to be so complex? I don't expect the present crop of politicians to revise it this year.
01. Taxpayers?
Who are the U.S. taxpayers anyway? I just read a letter to the Carroll County Times by David Iacono from Westminster, Maryland, who says that the Bank of America made $4.4 billion without paying any tax. He also says that they received a $45 billion taxpayer-funded bailout in 2008.
He also says that GE made $14.2 billion last year without paying any taxes, and that two-thirds of U.S. corporations paid no taxes from 1998 to 2005.
I don't know if this information is accurate or not, but I'll bet it is. I'm too lazy to check.
For some time now, I have thought that now that some billionaires are promising to donate some of their money to good causes.. why don't they give all but one billion to the U.S. Treasury and get us out of our deficit situation? Or at least, partially out.
02. Be Nice!
Someone just sent me a poem written by "Anonymous". The first part reads:
Share a smile or a friendly greeting
To a stranger on the street
It will bring a ray of sunshine
To some person you may meet.
This is a great suggestion and I would recommend it to everybody, except, perhaps, those who live in the dense center of some mega-city, like Boston or New York, where you probably will be slugged, sweared at, or arrested if you do so. But in smaller communities, it should work ok. I've been trying to practice this for many years.. and I've only been rewarded with an obscene gesture a few times.
03. Opera for the Masses
Harper's Magazine mentions that New York's City Opera grew out of President Roosevelt's WPA Music Project, during the Great Depression. The Music Project created orchestras to help unemployed musicians have a place to work. Resulting concerts cost 25 cents to attend.
New York's Mayor Fiorello LaGuardia was motivated to create what was called the People's Opera at the time. Even though it must compete with the Met, it has maintained popularity.
Incidentally, according to the Harper's article, LaGuardia's father came from Italy as part of an opera troupe.
04. More phobia.
Camophobia - Fear of marriage.
Cymnophobia - Fear of being naked.
Hierophobia - Fear of religious objects.
Ergasiophobia - Fear of work.
Ereuthophobia - Fear of blushing.
..and the most fearsome of all...
Pogonophobia - Fear of beards.
05. Phrases?
The following "phrases" seem to be in wide usage, but they are ones that make members of the Toastmasters organization very angry when they are heard.
"I was like..."
"I heart..."
"You know..."
"You can't tell me nothing."
"Ah."
"Um."
Forty years ago, the phrase "I mean, you know..." was heard constantly for a couple of years. . Now it is gone. Let's hope that the phrase "I was like..." has a short life expectancy as well.
Some exclamatory phrases that have "bit the dust" (so to speak):
"Twenty-one skiddoo!"
"Oh, you kid!"
"Egad!."
"Great Godfrey Daniels!"
06. Solved!
Many have wondered why phychiatrists have their patients lie on couches. I recently read that one of Sigmund Freud's colleagues, Dr. Willi Hofer said that Freud would put patients on a couch because he was shy and didn't want to look at them.
07. Phantom vibration syndrome.
A new problem for people who use cell phones a lot. It feels like you have a call, even when you don't.. so you are constantly grabbing at your pants pockets.
08. Cow talk.
In France, cows say, "Moi!"
In Poland, cows say, "Oom!"
In USA, cows say, "Moo!"
09. Death sentence.
Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me: Sitting is very unhealthful and doctors suggest doing it as little as possible. It was suggested that a medication called Standagra be developed for the problem. (Just try not to stand for more than four hours at a time.)
10. Riddle:
My brother, Joe, probably gave me this one.
What is greater than God
It's more evil than the Devil,
The rich man doesn't have it
The poor man does,
If you eat it, you'll die.
11. A Motel from Hell.
A few years ago, my family spent a night at a Virginia motel, with the following results:
Bathroom fixtures were filthy.
Floor was dirty.
Bed sheets were dirty.
Faucet leaked heavily and steadily.
Toilet had to be flushed five times before it cleaned up and stopped coming close to overflowing.
Air conditioner was covered with dust, and only one knob worked, and not very well, so it was either very cold or very hot all night long. Window couldn't be opened.
The only trash can was full.
"No Pets," but our next door neighbor had a barking dog.
People outside of the window were talking to midnight.
People were playing some form of football outside of room from 3:30 AM to 5:00 AM.
Had to use a rolled up newspaper to kill 5 flies during the night and 2 in the morning.
I couldn't catch the fly on the mirror and the one on the ceiling.
When I opened the door in the morning, 50 more flies flew in.
Both the room clerk and the only maid were too busy to help us, and the next motel was too far away to reach the same day.
In addition, when I woke up in the morning, my right upper leg was a mass of ugly red bite marks.
I wonder if my kids remember that motel?
12. Speaking of Flies:
I read somewhere that Chinese officials once gave a mandate to the Chinese people to get rid of flies. Each city and county Communist cell was given a quota of flies to kill, and that was said to be quite successful. How could they have been successful at dump sites, the smell of which would tend to cause flies to spontaneously appear?
The Week magazine mentions that Beijing has installed 100 deodorant cannons at the city's massive Asuwei dumpsite. The cannons will periodically spray gallons of fragrance over the piles of stinky, putrifying, fly-loving garbage.
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