Fifty Years Ago

Let's get away from the hectic and crazy news of 2011 and see what it was like 50 years ago, in 1961.

01. Brother Sebastian.

Chon Day was a famous cartoonist who was active around the 1960's. The copy above is of one of his cartoons, which I labeled, The Skater Monk. Another cartoon that I liked from 1961 showed two monks in their order's wine cellar, using a candle to look at a massive wine barrel with a spigot. They are holding large mugs.. but are chagrined to see a sign posted over the barrel: "No Underground Testing." (Of course, during 1961, underground nuclear testing was a big issue.)

02. Booze:

Dr. Dean K. Brooks of Salem, Oregon said (1961) that drinking is not sinful and no Christian should look down on another for doing it. However, he also said that there are 5 good reasons for total abstinence:

1. To help others, lest they be harmed by our drinking.

2. To insure efficiency.

3. To forgo a luxury.

4. For health reasons.

5. To provide a devotional discipline.

Dr. Brooks, superintendent of the Oregon State Hospital at Salem was a member of the Episcopal Church Joint Commission on Society and Alcohol.

He was fighting an uphill battle for abstinence, because in 1961, people "went out drinking".. (watch the TV Mad Men series and see what it was like back then.. that show is very accurate, in my opinion).. I'm sure that in 2011, some people still "go out drinking", especially young people.

(Last night, Elaine and I were at a restaurant, and a young (25-ish) lady had a 22-ounce draft beer in front of her.. later she downed another one. I hope she wasn't driving.... but, listen to me being judgemental.)

Back in 1961, I got my first pay check from the Government and guess what the first thing I did with it was? Yes.. I bought a case of beer.. everything else had to wait. I can't remember now how long the beer lasted.. probably not long.

Now, under Doctors' orders, I have my two glasses of wine or beer each day, to keep me from having heart problems.. but, hey, I'm an old dude and need that help.

03. Sign of the Times?

The town planners of Bath, England, decided in 1961 to order a Baptist minister to take down the six-foot high sign on the roof of his church. The sign read: "Prepare To Meet Thy God." The Bath officials said that it was advertising.

04. Newspaper feature:

The newspaper of Sing Sing Penitentiary began to add a society column in 1961.

05. 1961 Headline:

"5.5 MILLION AUTO FADIOS PRODUCED"

I guess reception wasn't so good back then.

06. Music.

Tokyo garbage men began to broadcast the sound of bells playing "Rock-a-Bye Baby" as they moved down the street, picking up trash.

07. Classic book review.

Since a lot has been written about Catcher in the Rye recently, I thought you might like to read this book review from 1961, which was written by R. Barbour of Billerica, Mass., to Time magazine, I think.

" Yes indeed, let our children study the great American classic, The Catcher in the Rye and learn, before their formative days are done, that all is vomity, and that man's spirit floats no higher down the byways of life's sewers than the rest of the garbage he so brilliantly produces."

08. Falsies for Men?

The men's fashion magazine Tailor and Cutter suggested that men might want to consider the reinstitution of padding for men's legs that was popular in the 1700's. These "falsies" were strapped on skinny legs at the calf to make them look muscular.

09. Burglary Alibi.

An Ohio burglary suspect came up with the best alibi heard for a long time. He explained that at the time of the burglary, he was buried in a coffin for 2 1/2 days at an Indiana fairground as part of a stunt.

10. Nursery Rhyme.

The three little Pigg children went to court (near the market) in Oklahoma, Michigan, and had their names changed to Bond. The parent Piggs decided to keep their names.

11. Occupation Names.

Mrs. Ann H. Romanick, of Ellicott City, Maryland, found these names:

Father Wise .. a Jesuit professor.

Mrs. Jewell .. an officer of a jewelry association.

Mr. Goldseker .. a real estate dealer.

Dr. Glasser .. an optometrist.

Dr. Mules .. a veterinarian

Dr. Brain .. an educator.

Mr. Flowers .. a florist.

Miss Viol .. a music teacher.

12. Macho Man?

From a 1961 article in the Baltimore Sun newspaper.

No Frenchman should ever agree to:

Prepare breakfast.

Empty the kitchen garbage can.

Wear an apron.

Collect groceries on his way home.

Push a baby carriage.

Defrost the refrigerator.

Sew on buttons.

Answer the doorbell.

Clean the bath., or tick off the daily help. (whatever that means)

However, since this is the second half of the Twentieth Century, he may, without loss of dignity:

Clean his own shoes.

Carve the roast.

Cut the bread.

Open canned goods.

Uncork the wine.

Order the wine.

Wash his own socks.

Do the dishes.....perhaps now and again.. but only on Sundays, never, never weekdays.

(How about the American man in 1961? And how about now 50 years later? Think about how times have changed... at least for most of American men, I would hope.)

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Real Old News

Just like Melville's Ishmael, when the everyday worries become overwhelming, I long for the sea. However, since the sea is over one hundred miles away from Westminster, Maryland, I must settle for some other diversion. Sometimes it is escape to news from "yesteryear."

I'm looking at a copy of The Literary Digest dated October 31, 1908 (101 years ago!) Some items that were of interest to me:

01. An ad showing a young lady with a bow tie sitting at a vintage Remington typewriter. Model 10 has a column selector, and model 11 has a built-in tabulator. (My grandkids may not know what a typewriter is... they probably don't even need to know what a word-processor is, as long as their agile fingers can "text".)

02. An ad for a two month's summer tour of Europe for $250.

03. An ad for GRAFT.."The game of the hour; the game for Election days. More fascinating than Bridge or Eucre... 50 cents."

04. Ad for 1,000 acres in West Virginia for $9,000.

05. Ad for Miss Hess' French School for Young Ladies.

06. Ad for "The 1909 Fad!" This device projects any sort of "Post Card, Sketch, Photograph, or Clipping in all the brilliant coloring" on the wall as a six-foot reproduction. Cost for this machine in its fully assembled form: $5.

07. News about the William J. Bryan and William H. Taft strategic struggle to gain sufficient electoral votes to win the Presidency. Teddy Roosevelt puts in his two cents. (It all sounds so familiar.)

08. News that the United States Battle-ship fleet sailed around the world and in Sydney Australia the fleet was welcomed by 9,000 school-kids grouped to form the words "Hail Columbia" and to trace the pattern in colors of the American and Australian flags.

And then... get this.. in Yokohama, to quote the New York Post: "Toward the close of the reception, at a collation on the after deck of the battle-ship, Captain Okada drank the health of Ambassador O'Brien. Then followed a demonstration that will be long remembered by the Americans. The Japanese admirals and captains raised Ambassador O'Brien on their shoulders and marched around the deck with him, everybody on board wildly cheering. The same performance was repeated with Rear-Admiral Sperry and each of the other American admirals present."

And then, the New York Tribune said "Japan and America are, and are likely to remain for a long time, the chief, we might say the only important, naval Powers in the Pacific" and indicated that this friendly reception should put to rest any suggestion of friction between these two countries.

09. Lots of news about the Balkans and Austria .. sounds like the problems that led up to WWI.

10. News that unemployment in England has reached "painful proportions." Mr. Stewart Gray, the leader of "Hunger Marchers" clashed with the police at Trafalgar Square. About 150,000 men in London are out of work.

11. Sir Hiram Maxim analyzed a "sure fire system" for beating the bank at Monte Carlo, and found that the player would probably win.. "one dollar in 21,474 years."

12. Lieutenant Colonel Andrew Buchanan, of the British Army in India says: "The best way to put a stop to the plague where it is epidemic is to keep cats."

13. Professor Gaston Bonnier of Paris says that "a beehive is a perfect example of the equalitarian product of state socialism."

14. "A system by which a wireless-telegraphic apparatus may control from a central station the clocks of a whole city is now in use in Vienna."

15. Joseph Ruau, French Minister of Agriculture says that "fraud is common in food manufacture, and reminds us that absolute purity is not practicable or necessary."

16. There is now a simple test for distinguishing between butter and "oleomargarin". (Sounds like a time-consuming process utilizing fresh milk and a "stick.")

17. Mr. Israel Zangwill caused a commotion with his play "The Melting Pot", where he implies that Jews will be best off in America by being "absorbed" through marriage. The Jewish Comment (Baltimore) likes his play and agrees with his thesis.

18. Mr. Marc Debrol, French writer, was asked if people in the US are religious in the "real sense of the word".. He replied: "No. The American is too taken up with the practical side of life, too preoccupied with conquests and gain, to be meditative. There is no introspection... in this race for the dollar, the finer sensibilities dry up..." (!) Debrol says that America is a charitable country, but "Charity does not spring from private initiative; it is carefully organised, and in many cases by the churches... The poor must be fed and clothed, not out of pity, but out of prudence; they must not become discontented and revolt, disturbers of the national peace."

19. An ad for the Flexible Flyer, the Sled that Steers. "Send for a free cardboard model showing how it steers."

20. An ad for Whitelaw's Paper Blankets. Sanitary. Healthful. Warm. $3.00 a dozen.

21. An ad for Postum (coffee substitute still sold next to coffees in supermarkets.. I drank it for years. "There are still some well-informed persons who do not know that coffee contains a drug -- caffeine."

22. Ad for Harderfold Hygienic Underwear with the Inter-Air-Space System... "... affording protection against the vicissitudes of our variable climate..."

23. Ad for The Keeley Cure for liquor and drug using.

24. Finally...!! A joke from the Washington Star:

The Crank. "You say there is nearly always something broke about your automobile?"
"Yes," answered Mr. Chuggins, nervously.
"What is it, as a rule?"
"Me."

... so, not much has changed in 101 years.

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More Wait Wait Info from Nov 7, 2009

One learns so much from NPR's great show: Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me! For instance, today I was amazed to learn this information:

01. The 7-11 stores will be selling their own brand of wine shortly. (As this was mentioned, the music in the background had what sounded like these lyrics: "I've got cheap wine, and free time...")

02. The hard hat was invented by Franz Kafka. (I find this utterly fantastic, but one should not be too surprised by anything that Mr. Kafka created.)

03. Someone somewhere has combined an MP3 player with a tazer.

04. Coco Krispies boxes boasted that the cereal could boost children's immunity. (But probably not to diabetes, someone said.) According to a television report last night, the company may have agreed to take the boast off the box.

05. According to a study, 22% of male texters are ending their messages with "hugs and kisses" symbols. (Cute!)

06. It was reported that a judge somewhere visited x-rated adult book stores hundreds of times recently. The judge said that he went to the store because they had such delicious chicken soup in their vending machine.

07. A Canadian study found that pregnant women who have a lot of morning sickness end up with babies with high IQ's. (Ok, fellow Mensa members, what do you think of that?)

08. Another study found that bad drivers are not to blame for their problems.. they inherited the traits from genes passed on from their parents.

09. In Germany, some inventive advertising person placed banners on flies legs and they displayed his messages as they flew about the audience.

10. South Korean cab drivers are now allowed to watch TV while they drive.

11. A woman called 911 to report that she was driving drunk. (or maybe to report all those cars that were driving on the wrong side of the freeway.)
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News of the Day August 15, 2009

Yesterday, I read the Baltimore Sun from beginning to end and could not find a pleasant story. The main reason I get that paper now is to see if me or any of my friends are included in the obituaries. I do like the Carroll County Times for their local news and Elaine likes to spend lots of time checking out their classified ads.

For instance: Today, Elaine was intrigued by four ads:

For sale: Nick nacks and Tubberware. (Somehow that makes sense.)

For sale: Building supplies, antquies and toys.

Free: A puggle. 7 months old.

Free: 1986 model toilet, you haul.
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I was intrigued by a few stories in the Sun:

01. Michael Phelps (you know, the swimming ace) was hit by a woman running a red light. His Cadillac Escalade (what else?) was damaged extensively, but Michael and his passengers were unharmed. What bothers me about this story, was that he was treated like a criminal by the policeman, and questioned as though it was a DUI case and he was the perpetrator.

02. Let me quote the Sun on this: "A 52-year old Howard County woman, whose mother was sentenced to six months in jail for abusing cats, must serve a day in jail for each of the 74 cats that died."

Nese Icgoren, a former equestrian champion in Turkey, said that she couldn't get her 81 year old mother to properly care for a small family of cats, then failed to do anything when that family swelled to over 100.

Huh? Can a daughter be penalized for not being able to force her mother to do something? Am I missing something? The judge, in passing sentence said: Those lives matter.. every one of them.

74 cats times 9 is 666 .. so should that have been the number of days served?

03. A prisoner from Jessup, Maryland choked the sheriff that was transporting him and disappeared. Somewhere in Howard County is a 20 year old with leg irons and handcuffs who outran groups of police officers, tracking dogs and helicopters, through a rural area. This sounds like a movie script.

04. An abused kitten is nearly ready to be adopted. Kids began by throwing rocks at the kitten and then poured a liquid on her and set her afire. The kitten was able to extinguish the flames, but the kids then set her on fire a second time. The doctor treating her says in spite of all she has been through, whenever anyone goes by her cage, she stands up and purrs.

I've seen a lot of evil acts in my life, mostly by children. I knew one child who made a point of punching every 4 or 5 year old within arms reach when he was around 11 years old. Of course, he had to have a course adjustment by that famous "bully beater".. namely me (but that is the subject of another blog.)

05. Headline: Defense tries to exclude DNA evidence in Harris murder. (No comment!)

06. Headline: 40 year sentence for shooter in killing of court witness. (Not enough time!)

07. The infamous "Hold Your Wee for a Wii" contest run by a Sacramento radio station in 2007 is still causing trouble for that station. One woman died and another now has a psychological fear of drinking water. (The ladies were given massive amounts of water to drink, and the one who did not pee in a three hour period won the contest.)

08. Jerry Seinfeld will be Jay Leno's first guest on his new show. One of my elderly friends was lamenting the fact that Conan O'Brien had taken Leno's place; she thinks that Conan's humor is juvenile. When I reminded her that Leno will be back, and at 10 pm instead of 11 pm, so she would be able to get to bed earlier, she seemed relieved. (She did say, as I have said many times, Johnny Carson was the best of the best on the Tonight Show.)

Elaine and I watched Leno when he did "Headlines" and when he interviewed the dumb college students. Other than those two segments, we would rather watch a Netflix movie or a DVR movie or go to bed (except that we are nightowls and like to stay up to 2 am.)

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