Well, it's Christmas time again, and we are once again tasked with finding gifts for our friends and neighbors who already have "everything." What a dilemma!
But.. yesterday, Elaine and I went on a search for those special gifts most people miss. Elaine's standards are a bit higher than mine. I look for good cheap items that are are also weird enough to be appreciated by cheap, weird people (not necessarily my friends and relatives.)
Here are some items, available at Big Lots Stores anywhere. I found them to be intriguing and I am seriously considering purchasing some of them.. meanwhile, I list them here for you to consider when you do your Christmas shopping this year.
01. For the serious drinker.
A clear glass bottle shaped like a chic high heel, filled with a pink fluid labeled "Non-Alcoholic Martini Mix." (I guess you can add the booze.) You can purchase this gem for only $5.
02. For the serious zaftig-girl watcher.
A "Wings" set, which includes a plate with the "Hooters" logo, a bottle of "the hottest" hot sauce, a basting brush, and tongs. Everything except chicken parts and a pot to cook it all in. What a bargain for just $12!
03. For the serious "retro" lover.
A lava lamp party kit for just $10. The box says: "Light up your party with LAVA barbecue!" To make that happen, the kit includes:
a "color-phasing" bottle opener
2 "color-phasing" shot glasses
4 "light-up" plastic ice cubes
Perhaps you could combine this with the "Wings" set and have a retro blast!
04. For the serious Elvis fan.
An authentic-looking street sign for "Elvis Presly Boulevard". For just $10, you can replace your existing street sign and drive your mail deliverer and neighbors crazy.
05. For the "child" in us all.
"Not just another flashlight. It stands. It crawls. It walks." Yes, it's the ROBOT Transforming Flashlight. When you don't need the bright beam to light your way to the LAVA wing party, you can twist it into all kinds of shapes. And I think I read where it is only $3. Now that is definitely a bargain. Even I would like to get one of those for Christmas.
06. For your favorite doggie.
Peanut-butter flavored cookies for your best friend. These "Dog Cookies" sell for only $3, and I'll bet they are delicious.
07. Also for your favorite doggie.
A nice bright red Santa Claus suit for your best friend to wear in our upcoming frigid Winter. A little pricey at $8, but well worth it. You know... you could combine this with some Rudolph antlers and have a very photogenic opportunity. Have Staples make your picture into Christmas cards and everyone will talk about you all year long.
08. For your tone-deaf friends.
Speaking of Rudolph, for $5 you can buy a fluffy Rudolph doll that sings that obnoxious song over and over again when you press his hoof.
09. For your friends who have an anger problem.
A "Jack in the Box" type Alvin. Alvin is one of the famous "Chipmonks". When he pops up, he starts to sing, along with his squeaky buddies. This is a great buy at $8. Give it to a person who has that anger management problem and they can relieve the pressure by throwing Alvin against the wall over and over.
10. For your scatalogically inclined friends.
Picture this. Santa Claus sitting on his recliner, with his cap off, smoking his pipe after his long Christmas Eve journey. Press Santa's mitten, and he says something to the effect: "I'm just sitting here resting, after shoveling reindeer poop all day." Just think of the humorous effect you have caused with your thoughtful $8 gift!
11. For your "fair weather" friends.
I've saved "the best" for last. This is a kneeling Santa Claus, holding high an unrolled "naughty" list. Santa is smiling broadly and when you press his knee, he gives out with repeated "Hee Hee's" while he shakes uncontrollably, and farts continually. His title is "Farting Santa" and he also costs $8.
So.. there it is .. my research is done for 2011. I hope it has helped you decide on a gift for someone who had been difficult to match with something appropriate.
Merry Christmas.. and remember that the best gift you can give someone is "yourself."
Showing posts with label Christmas. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Christmas. Show all posts
Saturday, December 03, 2011
Joe's Annual Christmas Gift Helper
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Sunday, July 17, 2011
Yes, it's a wonderful world
While lots of folks are dividing their time wondering whether Fox News will survive the Murdoch "scandal" and getting angry over the Casey Anthony jury verdict, amazing things are going on, some of which I want to mention here.
01. Dawn over Vesta.
NASA's Dawn spacecraft has entered orbit around the massive asteroid Vesta! Think about that for a while.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-14160135
02. A Light has gone out!
Our good friend, Jack Kolb passed away recently, and a memorial service was held for him at Carroll Lutheran Village in Westminster, Maryland. I was priviledged to say a few words and read a touching letter from one of his daughters.
Jack had many talents.. he got his pilot's license when he turned 16; he taught roller skating; he had a photographic business; he obtained two masters degrees; he served in the Department of Defence for many years, in liaison with the U.S. Army and NSA; he visited Greenland and the North Pole on twenty or so occasions; he was listed in several Who's Who's of noted Americans; he was an aide to Vice President Dan Quail; he was in contact with all of the American Nobel Laureates; he was a frequent contributor to Reader's Digest; he was a physics professor at American University; etc, etc.
Jack was also a sponsor of a young lady who wants to be a pediatric nurse, as Jack's late wife, Rita, was. Many of the great musicians and poets had "patrons" a few years ago. Jack enjoyed being such a patron and ensuring that a gifted person would be able to study without financial care.
Jack was in his eighties and I thought that he would be around for at least another fifteen years. I will miss his brilliant mind. I have been involved with Mensa and Intertel for over forty years, and have known some very smart folks.. however, none of them could match the breadth and depth of Jack's knowledge, in my opinion.
Rest In Peace, My Friend!
03. Ah Choo!
Somebody sent me some "facts" that are supposed to be true..
One was: when a person sneezes, their heart stops and brain functions cease.
If this is true.. there must be a lot of sneezing going on in Congress these days!
04. Innie? Outie?
Another "fact" was: Alfred Hitchcock did not have a belly button.
How could that be.. how did Lord Alfred get born.. I knew he was weird, but I didn't know it had something to do with parthenogenesis. Is he a reincarnation of Adam? (Wait a minute... Michaelangelo showed Adam with a belly button... huh?)
www.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Creation_of_Adam
I was taught in Sunday School that if one looked at a group of naked women, you would be able to tell which one was Eve by noting that she would be the only one without a belly button. (I always wondered why anyone would be interested in belly buttons in the company of naked women.)
Hey, Brother Joe.. help me out on this.
05. Dear Anonymous:
This blog gets a lot of comments from someone named Anonymous. Sometimes the comment is in Chinese or Japanese .. sometimes in Korean .. sometimes in French or German .. but most often in English. I have tried to translate the Asian comments, but the results were usually unintelligible.. reading as though they were like "Headlines" on the Jay Leno show. I can read the French, German and English ones, which are often advertisements, requests for help with computer issues, or requests for information on medical problems such as body odor, or similar.
However, sometimes the comments relate to the blog entry and are very interesting, and I do try to respond with a related comment. I would, however, ask that if you want an appropriate response, that you include your email address in your comment.
06. Important Health Fact from an Almanac:
With proper care, the human body will last a lifetime.
07. Now they tell me!
The Week magazine recently reported that a Purdue University study shows that artificial sweeteners could be making you fat.
The researchers found that "rats fed a steady diet of sugar substitutes were hungrier and gained more weight than rats that ate surgary food... It appears that artificial sweeteners confuse the body, which is programmed to associate swet tastes with calories consumed, and when we repeatedly eat something sweet that provides little or no calories, we break that connection, and our confused bodies keep seeking more food."
"... the rats that frequently ate sugar substitutes, also didn't have the metabolic increase that usually follows eating a meal, so they burned fewer calories..." according to researcher Susan Swithers.
08. Zukes
Our Earthbox gardens are overtaking our deck this Summer. So far, we have enjoyed several red tomatoes, a number of yellow squashes, some green beans, three cucumbers, and four giant zucchinis.
The other day, I found my Aunt Mary's Zucchini Bread recipe and I can't wait to make and taste some. However, before I can make it, I have to buy some things that we don't keep in our house:
sugar (see #07 above)
baking soda
baking powder
Whenever I would visit my Aunt Mary, she would always have zucchini bread for me to eat, Summer or Winter.. she started keeping some in her freezer, as soon as refridgerators began to have freezers connected to them.
09. The Iceman Cometh
What on earth did we do before we had freezers? I remember, as a kid, stealing ice shavings from the iceman as he went into houses to deliver giant blocks of ice for the icebox. I remember my grandmother paying the iceman 35 cents for enough ice to fill our icebox, a big wooden cabinet, whose top opened up to reveal a metal container for the ice.
Once, on a tour of Thomas Jefferson's Virginia home, the tour guide showed us Mr. Jefferson's ice house. In the Winter, his slaves would go out on the frozen ponds and cut out huge blocks of ice, which they would bring back to his estate and place in the ice house, which was dug out of the ground. Then, they would cover the ice with straw and hay and hope that this would keep the ice more or less frozen for a long time.. perhaps even until the Summer months.
The tour guide reminded us of what a great equalizer ice was. Everybody had ice.. the rich had it in the Summer, the poor had it in the Winter.
10. Christmas in July
In New Windsor, Maryland.. about 25 miles northwest of Baltimore, and next to our Carroll Lutheran Village home in Westminster, Maryland.. is an organization called SERRV. This organization acts as a middleman for native people around the world who want to sell items that they produce. The organization is church-affiliated and therefore is a non-profit organization.
SERRV will be having a Christmas in July sale until July 23, 2011. This year they will be featuring Christmas ornaments, tree skirts, nativity scenes, Divine dark chocolate, baskets, specialty coffee, and much more. All items are at 60% of their usual price.
If you are looking for something to do, and you want to see some interesting and different merchandise, drop by. And, if you purchase anything, you will be helping ordinary native craftsmen from around the world.
11. Baby, Baby!
The Week magazine reports that a lady in Texas (of course.. everything in Texas is gigantic).. gave birth to a 2 foot long, 16 pound baby! Ow! .. maybe not quite OW!.. because it was delivered by Caesarean Section. ("Hey, doc, knock me out and wake me up when the hairdresser shows up.")
My late wife's French Canadian relatives talked about the 14 pound babies that were common back in Canada years ago. Pregnant women were encouraged to eat 4 or more hefty meals each day during their nine months. Of course, many women died in childbirth back in those days. Pre-natal care? What was that?
12. Handwriting!?
Indiana third-graders may no longer be taught cursive, because it is thought that they would never use it.. being so computer literate and such.. with texting much more useful... Come on.. what kind of nonsense is this? Are we supposed to allow a generation of people to grow up not knowing how to read a letter written by their grandmother? (I would not be able to enjoy my Aunt Mary's zucchini recipe if I was not able to decipher her handwriting.)
When I was stationed in Germany, I taught myself basic German, including Gothic text and handwriting.. which at some point in time was not being taught to German school children. Thus, I ended up in the strange situation where I, as an American, could read letters written in the "old" handwriting, while some of my German-born and raised acquaintances could not. Will that be the case for cursive in the US?
Should schools stop teaching math because we now rely mainly on calculators and computers?
..........................................................................................................................
01. Dawn over Vesta.
NASA's Dawn spacecraft has entered orbit around the massive asteroid Vesta! Think about that for a while.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-14160135
02. A Light has gone out!
Our good friend, Jack Kolb passed away recently, and a memorial service was held for him at Carroll Lutheran Village in Westminster, Maryland. I was priviledged to say a few words and read a touching letter from one of his daughters.
Jack had many talents.. he got his pilot's license when he turned 16; he taught roller skating; he had a photographic business; he obtained two masters degrees; he served in the Department of Defence for many years, in liaison with the U.S. Army and NSA; he visited Greenland and the North Pole on twenty or so occasions; he was listed in several Who's Who's of noted Americans; he was an aide to Vice President Dan Quail; he was in contact with all of the American Nobel Laureates; he was a frequent contributor to Reader's Digest; he was a physics professor at American University; etc, etc.
Jack was also a sponsor of a young lady who wants to be a pediatric nurse, as Jack's late wife, Rita, was. Many of the great musicians and poets had "patrons" a few years ago. Jack enjoyed being such a patron and ensuring that a gifted person would be able to study without financial care.
Jack was in his eighties and I thought that he would be around for at least another fifteen years. I will miss his brilliant mind. I have been involved with Mensa and Intertel for over forty years, and have known some very smart folks.. however, none of them could match the breadth and depth of Jack's knowledge, in my opinion.
Rest In Peace, My Friend!
03. Ah Choo!
Somebody sent me some "facts" that are supposed to be true..
One was: when a person sneezes, their heart stops and brain functions cease.
If this is true.. there must be a lot of sneezing going on in Congress these days!
04. Innie? Outie?
Another "fact" was: Alfred Hitchcock did not have a belly button.
How could that be.. how did Lord Alfred get born.. I knew he was weird, but I didn't know it had something to do with parthenogenesis. Is he a reincarnation of Adam? (Wait a minute... Michaelangelo showed Adam with a belly button... huh?)
www.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Creation_of_Adam
I was taught in Sunday School that if one looked at a group of naked women, you would be able to tell which one was Eve by noting that she would be the only one without a belly button. (I always wondered why anyone would be interested in belly buttons in the company of naked women.)
Hey, Brother Joe.. help me out on this.
05. Dear Anonymous:
This blog gets a lot of comments from someone named Anonymous. Sometimes the comment is in Chinese or Japanese .. sometimes in Korean .. sometimes in French or German .. but most often in English. I have tried to translate the Asian comments, but the results were usually unintelligible.. reading as though they were like "Headlines" on the Jay Leno show. I can read the French, German and English ones, which are often advertisements, requests for help with computer issues, or requests for information on medical problems such as body odor, or similar.
However, sometimes the comments relate to the blog entry and are very interesting, and I do try to respond with a related comment. I would, however, ask that if you want an appropriate response, that you include your email address in your comment.
06. Important Health Fact from an Almanac:
With proper care, the human body will last a lifetime.
07. Now they tell me!
The Week magazine recently reported that a Purdue University study shows that artificial sweeteners could be making you fat.
The researchers found that "rats fed a steady diet of sugar substitutes were hungrier and gained more weight than rats that ate surgary food... It appears that artificial sweeteners confuse the body, which is programmed to associate swet tastes with calories consumed, and when we repeatedly eat something sweet that provides little or no calories, we break that connection, and our confused bodies keep seeking more food."
"... the rats that frequently ate sugar substitutes, also didn't have the metabolic increase that usually follows eating a meal, so they burned fewer calories..." according to researcher Susan Swithers.
08. Zukes
Our Earthbox gardens are overtaking our deck this Summer. So far, we have enjoyed several red tomatoes, a number of yellow squashes, some green beans, three cucumbers, and four giant zucchinis.
The other day, I found my Aunt Mary's Zucchini Bread recipe and I can't wait to make and taste some. However, before I can make it, I have to buy some things that we don't keep in our house:
sugar (see #07 above)
baking soda
baking powder
Whenever I would visit my Aunt Mary, she would always have zucchini bread for me to eat, Summer or Winter.. she started keeping some in her freezer, as soon as refridgerators began to have freezers connected to them.
09. The Iceman Cometh
What on earth did we do before we had freezers? I remember, as a kid, stealing ice shavings from the iceman as he went into houses to deliver giant blocks of ice for the icebox. I remember my grandmother paying the iceman 35 cents for enough ice to fill our icebox, a big wooden cabinet, whose top opened up to reveal a metal container for the ice.
Once, on a tour of Thomas Jefferson's Virginia home, the tour guide showed us Mr. Jefferson's ice house. In the Winter, his slaves would go out on the frozen ponds and cut out huge blocks of ice, which they would bring back to his estate and place in the ice house, which was dug out of the ground. Then, they would cover the ice with straw and hay and hope that this would keep the ice more or less frozen for a long time.. perhaps even until the Summer months.
The tour guide reminded us of what a great equalizer ice was. Everybody had ice.. the rich had it in the Summer, the poor had it in the Winter.
10. Christmas in July
In New Windsor, Maryland.. about 25 miles northwest of Baltimore, and next to our Carroll Lutheran Village home in Westminster, Maryland.. is an organization called SERRV. This organization acts as a middleman for native people around the world who want to sell items that they produce. The organization is church-affiliated and therefore is a non-profit organization.
SERRV will be having a Christmas in July sale until July 23, 2011. This year they will be featuring Christmas ornaments, tree skirts, nativity scenes, Divine dark chocolate, baskets, specialty coffee, and much more. All items are at 60% of their usual price.
If you are looking for something to do, and you want to see some interesting and different merchandise, drop by. And, if you purchase anything, you will be helping ordinary native craftsmen from around the world.
11. Baby, Baby!
The Week magazine reports that a lady in Texas (of course.. everything in Texas is gigantic).. gave birth to a 2 foot long, 16 pound baby! Ow! .. maybe not quite OW!.. because it was delivered by Caesarean Section. ("Hey, doc, knock me out and wake me up when the hairdresser shows up.")
My late wife's French Canadian relatives talked about the 14 pound babies that were common back in Canada years ago. Pregnant women were encouraged to eat 4 or more hefty meals each day during their nine months. Of course, many women died in childbirth back in those days. Pre-natal care? What was that?
12. Handwriting!?
Indiana third-graders may no longer be taught cursive, because it is thought that they would never use it.. being so computer literate and such.. with texting much more useful... Come on.. what kind of nonsense is this? Are we supposed to allow a generation of people to grow up not knowing how to read a letter written by their grandmother? (I would not be able to enjoy my Aunt Mary's zucchini recipe if I was not able to decipher her handwriting.)
When I was stationed in Germany, I taught myself basic German, including Gothic text and handwriting.. which at some point in time was not being taught to German school children. Thus, I ended up in the strange situation where I, as an American, could read letters written in the "old" handwriting, while some of my German-born and raised acquaintances could not. Will that be the case for cursive in the US?
Should schools stop teaching math because we now rely mainly on calculators and computers?
..........................................................................................................................
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Saturday, December 18, 2010
Christmas is a-comin..
It's time to wish everyone a Merry Christmas and hope that their wishes come true during the holiday season.01. Santa Claus: As you can see by my picture, I have played "Santa" again this year. I had been offered a "Santa" job.. for actual pay.. but I decided not to do so.. my main reason was not wanting little kids to throw up on me. So, I just go "HO HO HO" for free, and for adults who have no desire to sit on my lap..
I'm hoping that this year will be the last one in which I actually look like a jolly, fat old Santa. I am taking Physical Therapy sessions to regain use of some of the flexibility and muscle tone I have lost since I quit lifting weights about ten years ago. One of my problems is what is called "tissue approximation." (This can be translated to "beer belly.") One of my goals this year is to lose 20 pounds around my middle.
02. Alzheimers: This Week magazine reports that some study results show that people with beer bellies actually have shrunken brains.. making them more susceptible to developing Alzheimers disease. That's another incentive for losing weight.
03. XMAS Toy: Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me mentioned that a popular toy this year is somehow related to "roadkill". I need to look that up in the XMAS toy catalogs. If you travel throughout Carroll County Maryland, you see lots and lots of roadkill.. so why pay for it when you can get it free.
Yesterday, while turning through a highway cloverleaf, I came upon 238 enormous turkey buzzards having lunch on roadkill. As I mentioned a couple of years ago, turkey buzzards completely devoured a large deer that had wandered into my backyard to die. In a very short time, only bones were left of the 500 pound creature, and so I didn't have to drag the dead body to wherever you drag dead deer that have died on your property.
04. Fashion? The New York Times suggests that men should start using purses that reflect their manhood. Not dainty pink things; but rather, bags made out of camouflage cloth, or ammunition cases, or ... out of whatever would indicate manhood. Sounds good to me.. for years I have carried a wallet in one back pocket, a comb, handkerchief, pen, paper sheet, business card case in another back pocket.. plus a bunch of keys and cell phone attached to my belt. I think it might be better to carry all such things in a carrying case, such as women have.
However, the fear of being considered a "sissy" by other men has kept most of us guys from carrying purse-like containers over our shoulders. But.. suppose I owned a "purse" that somehow reflected just the things I am interested in as a man.. like whales.. or crossword puzzles.. or politics.. maybe that would work. I'll have to look into this. Of course, this could be dangerous since most men are just interested in naked women.
I carry a delicate red basket to our local Bistro to get carry-out supper on most nights. This gets me lots of gentle ribbing.. but so what, it works.. I can carry lots of food without dropping it on the ground. Now.. if the basket had pink ribbons on it.. that would be a different story.
05. Don't ask...: Some people might equate what I implied about "sissy" as meaning "gay".. That is not the case. Many of the gay people that I know are not "sissies" in any sense of the word. The House has just acted to repeal Don't Ask, Don't Tell and the Senate is considering the issue right now. I served with several gay persons when I was in the Air Force and there was never any problem in any way. And that was the situation when I worked in the physical fitness department of the New Bedford, Mass. YMCA. These folks were not "sissies".. or delicate, tiptoeing folks.
06. Manufacturing: I heard that the Gap stores are selling a carrying bag with the words: "Made in the USA" printed on it. Close inspection reveals that it really was made in China.. just like everything else in the USA.
Before WWII, when Japanese products flooded our markets, they renamed a city Usa, so that they could print "Made in USA" on goods shipped to America.
07. Pickup line: I think it might have been Wait Wait that reported on the best pickup line: "You have beautiful lips." But do you think that lips are the most attractive feature on women for men, or are men just lying again.
08. Eyebrows: It might have been Wait Wait again that mentioned that the current month should be known as DECEMBROW.. the month when women avoid plucking their eyebrows, so to achieve the UNIBROW look.
Lots of men I know have just one eyebrow...straight over both eyes. Most men don't pluck their eyebrows.. and some men are just naturally extra hairy, even on their forehead. And then there are hairy men who have "dingleberries".. but that is a subect for a future blog (and maybe #9 that follows.)
09. Word: Bill Bryson in Made in America records a Pennsylvania Dutch word: aarschgnoddle: which translates to "the globules of dung found in the vicinity of the anus"... Bill wonders why the Pennsylvania Dutch need such a word.. so do I.
10. More of the same: Bryson also says that the word POPPYCOCK comes from the Dutch word PAPPEKAK (soft dung).
How did I get into this topic anyway? What do you think of that, Prince Poppycock?
11. New SCAM: I received an email from "Robert S. Mueller III, Federal Bureau of Investigation, J. Edgar Hoover Building, 935 Pennsylvania Avenue, NW Washington, D.C. 20535-0001, USA" saying "The Skye Bank Nigeria Plc informed us the FBI, that they are through with the first (1st) quarter transfer to beneficiaries, and .... (to) where your payment file belongs to now."
Mr Mueller advises me to get in touch with the Skye Bank Nigeria as soon as possible so I don't lose out on all the money ($2m) that I may be eligible for.. they give me an email address to contact.. IMMEDIATELY. They end it with "In God We Trust."
A clever twist on an old scam.
12. Risks: The Carroll Hospital Center (Maryland) sent me the following quote from Patrick Johnston. I like it.
To laugh is to risk appearing the fool.
To weep is to risk appearing sentimental.
To reach out to another is to risk involvement.
To explore feelings is to risk exposing our true self.
To place your ideas, your dreams before the crowd is to risk loss.
To love is to risk not being loved in return.
To live is to risk dying.
To hope is to risk despair.
To try at all is to risk failure.
But risk we must, because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing.
The man, the woman, who risks nothing, does nothing, has nothing, is nothing.
.....
This reminds me of something a famous writer once said to would-be authors:
Don't sit down to write, until you have stood up to live.
..................................................................................................................................
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Saturday, December 11, 2010
Happy Holidays?
Holiday season 2010:
01. Baltimore's carol: I hope that you have heard "Crabs for Christmas". If you listen to WAMU (Washington, DC FM station) you know that the host of the "Old Time Radio" show was the first person to sing that great song. At the December meeting of the Carroll County AARP, the leader of the Senior Singers played the piano and sang a marvelous Baltimorese version of the words.. and he isn't even a native Marylander! Made me want to run right out and order me some nice spicy Balty More crabs.
02. HON trademark: I'm glad that Denise Whiting has now gotten "HON" trademarked. She was the originator of the HON madness that engulfs the Hamden area, as well as all of Baltimore. She doesn't want folks exploiting something that she thought up. However, she also doesn't want to exploit it herself. I've met Denise and she is a wonderful caring person.. a fine representative of what is good about Baltimore people.
03. Good lungs now: A Chicago songwriter has written a holiday song, some of the words of which are: "Santa doesn't smoke anymore." "He must have read the surgeon general's warning." "He took one last puff, and then said: I've had enough!"
I encourage you to find this song, as well as a copy of "Crabs for Christmas" and get into the spirit of the holidays.
04. Hanukah Rocks: We should all be ecomenical this year, so I encourage you to also get a copy of Walk on the Kosher Side, songs by rock band Gefilte Joe and the Fish.
05. How Bigotry celebrates the season: I understand that the scumbags from the Westboro Baptist Church will be picketing Elizabeth Edwards' funeral because they say she didn't ask God to cure her cancer.
06. Rudolph: I never could understand the worth of the message of this song. A group ostracises another creature for being different, and when the different being does something that the group approves of, that different being is now beloved by the group...? Shouldn't we be teaching our kids to love everyone, even the ones that are different, and not wait until they "earn" our love? I know, I know.. it's just a fun song for Christmas...
07. With charity to all? Thanks to Bill Gates, Warren Buffet, and a couple of other guys who know how to make a buck, some billionaires are going to give money to charity while they are still alive. Kind of hard to be synical about that.
08. Wiki Leaks XMAS Cards? Some of my friends applaud the leaks. I don't. I was a cryptographer when I was in the Air Force, and I have some acquaintance with Top Secrets, and I believe that some degree of secrecy is necessary for a Nation to survive in these troubled times. Don't ask me to elaborate.. my lips are sealed.
09. Christmas in New York: NPR reports that one of the tunnels in and out of the city carries two versions of the same billboard picture. It is a manger scene... one billboard was paid for by the Catholic Church; one billboard was paid for by an Atheist group. Only the wording is different.
10. Cool heads: A man in Cumberland, Maryland, is charged with stealing over one thousand custom fitting hats. (Incidentally, his name is Wigger.) I like to think that he just wanted to give them to the poor and homeless as a gesture of friendship in the holiday spirit. (Elaine made me wear my Santa Claus hat all this week.)
11. Hot heads: Yesterday, crowds of protesters in London tried to paint Prince Charles' limousine for Christmas. Charles and Camilla showed typical British reserve by waving to the holiday host.
12. Winter Wonderland: Yesterday, a forecast of snow flurries came true.. about a quarter of an inch fell, at least in Carroll County, Maryland. It may sound strange to those who live in northern climes (like Massachusetts or Rhode Island).. but this minute amount of precip caused major havoc. One lady reported taking 3 hours to travel 6 miles on a major road. Schools closed early and businesses instituted a liberal leave policy.
Giant Grocery Store experienced a run on toilet paper, bread and milk, as folks stocked up for a long Winter's hibernation. Elaine and I slipped and slid to the Elk's Club for a luncheon. Safe at last, we sat and stuffed ourselves as we remembered those ancient days when we had to put chains on our tires in order to move in traffic.
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01. Baltimore's carol: I hope that you have heard "Crabs for Christmas". If you listen to WAMU (Washington, DC FM station) you know that the host of the "Old Time Radio" show was the first person to sing that great song. At the December meeting of the Carroll County AARP, the leader of the Senior Singers played the piano and sang a marvelous Baltimorese version of the words.. and he isn't even a native Marylander! Made me want to run right out and order me some nice spicy Balty More crabs.
02. HON trademark: I'm glad that Denise Whiting has now gotten "HON" trademarked. She was the originator of the HON madness that engulfs the Hamden area, as well as all of Baltimore. She doesn't want folks exploiting something that she thought up. However, she also doesn't want to exploit it herself. I've met Denise and she is a wonderful caring person.. a fine representative of what is good about Baltimore people.
03. Good lungs now: A Chicago songwriter has written a holiday song, some of the words of which are: "Santa doesn't smoke anymore." "He must have read the surgeon general's warning." "He took one last puff, and then said: I've had enough!"
I encourage you to find this song, as well as a copy of "Crabs for Christmas" and get into the spirit of the holidays.
04. Hanukah Rocks: We should all be ecomenical this year, so I encourage you to also get a copy of Walk on the Kosher Side, songs by rock band Gefilte Joe and the Fish.
05. How Bigotry celebrates the season: I understand that the scumbags from the Westboro Baptist Church will be picketing Elizabeth Edwards' funeral because they say she didn't ask God to cure her cancer.
06. Rudolph: I never could understand the worth of the message of this song. A group ostracises another creature for being different, and when the different being does something that the group approves of, that different being is now beloved by the group...? Shouldn't we be teaching our kids to love everyone, even the ones that are different, and not wait until they "earn" our love? I know, I know.. it's just a fun song for Christmas...
07. With charity to all? Thanks to Bill Gates, Warren Buffet, and a couple of other guys who know how to make a buck, some billionaires are going to give money to charity while they are still alive. Kind of hard to be synical about that.
08. Wiki Leaks XMAS Cards? Some of my friends applaud the leaks. I don't. I was a cryptographer when I was in the Air Force, and I have some acquaintance with Top Secrets, and I believe that some degree of secrecy is necessary for a Nation to survive in these troubled times. Don't ask me to elaborate.. my lips are sealed.
09. Christmas in New York: NPR reports that one of the tunnels in and out of the city carries two versions of the same billboard picture. It is a manger scene... one billboard was paid for by the Catholic Church; one billboard was paid for by an Atheist group. Only the wording is different.
10. Cool heads: A man in Cumberland, Maryland, is charged with stealing over one thousand custom fitting hats. (Incidentally, his name is Wigger.) I like to think that he just wanted to give them to the poor and homeless as a gesture of friendship in the holiday spirit. (Elaine made me wear my Santa Claus hat all this week.)
11. Hot heads: Yesterday, crowds of protesters in London tried to paint Prince Charles' limousine for Christmas. Charles and Camilla showed typical British reserve by waving to the holiday host.
12. Winter Wonderland: Yesterday, a forecast of snow flurries came true.. about a quarter of an inch fell, at least in Carroll County, Maryland. It may sound strange to those who live in northern climes (like Massachusetts or Rhode Island).. but this minute amount of precip caused major havoc. One lady reported taking 3 hours to travel 6 miles on a major road. Schools closed early and businesses instituted a liberal leave policy.
Giant Grocery Store experienced a run on toilet paper, bread and milk, as folks stocked up for a long Winter's hibernation. Elaine and I slipped and slid to the Elk's Club for a luncheon. Safe at last, we sat and stuffed ourselves as we remembered those ancient days when we had to put chains on our tires in order to move in traffic.
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Saturday, December 26, 2009
Christmas 2009 Family Stuff
This blog is all about family stuff, so why don't you just skip by it.
We had a great Christmas at my daughter Diane and son-in-law John's house. Last year they purchased my house in Gamber, Maryland and I am pleased to see all the nice things they have done with it. It was also very pleasant to visit with my kids, grandkids and great-grandchild, Cameron. And, of course, it is always nice to see Elaine's daughter Emily, her son-in-law Mat, and her delightful granddaughter Lily.
Someone gave Lily a pink digital camera for Christmas and she has learned how to use it (she's only 2 1/2 years old!) I tried to figure it out but couldn't. If you want to see what Lily looks like, you might want to check out her website: www.lilydoria.com. That's right, she has her own website.
I was also pleased to learn that my Grandson Dylan has chosen Computer Science for a major in college. For years, individuals in the Vaughan lineage have taught in school or in other places. My brother Leon is teaching right now and several of my cousins are retired teachers. I taught safe driving for eight years, although I was able to get into the computer field, so I am glad that members of the family are considering computer careers for a change. My granddaughter Bridget is studying graphic design in college, and all of my grandchildren are computer literate.
The Baltimore County (Maryland) Beacon newspaper says that surfing the Web may boost brain functions. Research suggests that searching the Internet triggers the centers of the brain that control decision making and complex reasoning. But Dr. Gary Small (UCLA) cautions that its debatable whether or not surfing actually makes you smarter or not. Dr. Small says that Internet searching appears to engage more neural circuitry than is engaged in reading.
For more information on this subject, you can visit www.aging.ucla.edu/TechAgingConference.html
My great-grandson Cameron is a good artist at age 6 and made a charicature of himself and had it framed as a gift to me. In the picture, he looks a lot like Charlie Brown. I'll scan it in and post it to a blog.
We did a Yankee Swap at the party.. a video named The Hangover was bid on over and over. It must be a good movie.. or very sexy.
My daughter Elizabeth made the greatest Maryland cream of crab soup that I have ever had. We brought some home and had it for lunch today. Yummmm! Diane had made two delicious turkeys and two delicious hams and lots of people had brought dishes of food and great desserts.
I made snow globes for everyone and put each person's picture (s) inside. I'm not sure how that went over.. maybe it didn't, but I had fun doing it.
Thanks for listening, family members. I love you all. Joe (alias Prepop)
We had a great Christmas at my daughter Diane and son-in-law John's house. Last year they purchased my house in Gamber, Maryland and I am pleased to see all the nice things they have done with it. It was also very pleasant to visit with my kids, grandkids and great-grandchild, Cameron. And, of course, it is always nice to see Elaine's daughter Emily, her son-in-law Mat, and her delightful granddaughter Lily.
Someone gave Lily a pink digital camera for Christmas and she has learned how to use it (she's only 2 1/2 years old!) I tried to figure it out but couldn't. If you want to see what Lily looks like, you might want to check out her website: www.lilydoria.com. That's right, she has her own website.
I was also pleased to learn that my Grandson Dylan has chosen Computer Science for a major in college. For years, individuals in the Vaughan lineage have taught in school or in other places. My brother Leon is teaching right now and several of my cousins are retired teachers. I taught safe driving for eight years, although I was able to get into the computer field, so I am glad that members of the family are considering computer careers for a change. My granddaughter Bridget is studying graphic design in college, and all of my grandchildren are computer literate.
The Baltimore County (Maryland) Beacon newspaper says that surfing the Web may boost brain functions. Research suggests that searching the Internet triggers the centers of the brain that control decision making and complex reasoning. But Dr. Gary Small (UCLA) cautions that its debatable whether or not surfing actually makes you smarter or not. Dr. Small says that Internet searching appears to engage more neural circuitry than is engaged in reading.
For more information on this subject, you can visit www.aging.ucla.edu/TechAgingConference.html
My great-grandson Cameron is a good artist at age 6 and made a charicature of himself and had it framed as a gift to me. In the picture, he looks a lot like Charlie Brown. I'll scan it in and post it to a blog.
We did a Yankee Swap at the party.. a video named The Hangover was bid on over and over. It must be a good movie.. or very sexy.
My daughter Elizabeth made the greatest Maryland cream of crab soup that I have ever had. We brought some home and had it for lunch today. Yummmm! Diane had made two delicious turkeys and two delicious hams and lots of people had brought dishes of food and great desserts.
I made snow globes for everyone and put each person's picture (s) inside. I'm not sure how that went over.. maybe it didn't, but I had fun doing it.
Thanks for listening, family members. I love you all. Joe (alias Prepop)
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