Weekly Dozen

Let's see if I can come up with 12 weird news items and random thoughts for the first week in 2010. Some of these items were mentioned in Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me and others came from radio, TV, newspaper or magazine sources.. and some from my own aging brain.

01. Why do software developers make you open a string of years to get to your own year of birth? In my case, it takes me a long time to scroll through all those years until I hit my year.

And besides, it's depressing to know that I am that old! Instead, they could just say "type in your year of birth." And why do they need to know how old you are anyway? Teenagers lie about their age to be thought older and old folks lie about their age to be thought younger.

So.. my suggestion to the software developers would be: just say: "Pick a year of birth that pleases you."

02. 3D TV is coming! Flushed with the success of the Avatar movie, some enterprising persons are getting it ready to spring on the U.S. market. (Will we have to wear special glasses? Will our cats and dogs be scared? Our cat, SuZee watches TV with us and sometimes sudden movements make her jump.)

03. I wonder is anyone has thought of a new way to fill the country's ailing coffers: selling pictures from full body scans at airports. As I understand it, faces will be blanked out, so nobody will recognize who the person in (save in a few exceptional cases).. the best buyers of this material would probably be Middle School boys, and they are the ones who seem to have the most disposable income.

Actually, to expand on that, the Government could sell viewing tickets.. or maybe, plug the scans into a 24 hour closed circuit cable channel selling subscriptions like is done for HBO and the like. Perhaps some new kind of game shows or reality TV could be developed from this. The possibilities are endless.

04. I understand that the Pope will now be copyrighted... I wonder what that means. Does that have anthing to do with being knocked down by that crazy lady?

05. Some sharks have been implanted with radio devices that automatically text where they are so that lifeguards can warn swimmers. (Texting sharks.. what next?)

06. The inventor of the McDonald's Quarter Pounder died recently. I wonder what the cause of death was.

07. Would you believe this? (Frequent flyers know this already.) Sky Mall sells an eyeball massager!

08. Due to the current cold weather in Florida, chilled iguanas are falling out of trees.

09. A Dr. Frankel has suggested that Mona Lisa's smile was caused by high cholesterol. (Hey.. maybe we all could have our pictures painted to help our doctors in their diagnostic activity.)

10. Watch out! Apparently, some jokesters are putting baking soda in ketchup bottles in some restaurants. When the cap is opened, the ketchup explodes onto your nice new necktie. (Guess what's going to happen when the word gets out about this one.)

11. Hewlett Packard has developed a new web cam that automatically follows you.. as long as you are a pale white person.

12. Someone has developed a transparent toaster. Now you can get your toast just right.

Bonus:

Left shoe thieves are at it again in Sweden.

Leno may be coming back to his old time slot.

After being treated for chest pains, Rush Limbaugh (multi-millionaire) says that the US health system doesn't need fixing.

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