My Carotid is Clear and all's right with the World

On Wednesday, I had the carotid endarterectomy procedure and now my risk of stroke has diminished and I have more time to sit in my rocking chair and enjoy old age, or so I'm told.

Carotid endarterectomy is a procedure where plaque is removed from the major arteries in the neck area. That plaque sometimes causes the brain to get starved for nourishing blood and sometimes part of the plaque breaks off and causes a stroke. I was very nervous about having this done because there is some risk of stroke during the operation, and I definitely do not want to lose any of my brain faculties, such as they are.

Well, the procedure is done, and now my brain is getting more blood than it has been used to for some time. I'm anxious to see if my puzzle-solving ability is enhanced. Elaine seems to think that it might help me stop forgetting things, like names. I doubt it.

I had the operation done at Mercy Hospital in Baltimore. The people there are very solicitous and tried every way to make my life comfortable. My only complaint was with the breakfast on the morning after the operation. They advertised home fries, and scrambled eggs. Instead, I had two long slivers of shaved ham which was almost all fat. If you cut off the fat, you were left with only one inch of skinny meat. And the potatoes were kind of cool and uncooked. The coffee did not deserve the name. But, I didn't really expect much so I wasn't disappointed. At lunch time, the meal was much better.. barbeque chicken and vegetables.

At the hospital I had one experience that I wasn't prepared for. A young lady insisted on giving me a bath. She was from Capetown, South Africa and she was glad that someone was finally interested enough to talk to her about her home town, that she obviously was very homesick for.

I won't be able to shave for two weeks.. maybe I'll grow a beard. All I have right now for facial hair is a Wilfred Brimley mustache. My beard of a few years ago was supposed to make me look like Captain Ahab.. or at least, the Gregory Peck version. I like to think that I was a "trend-setter" in facial hair.. in high school when none of the other kids had sideburns, I did. Then when they began to grow them, I shaved mine off.

My son-in-law, John and Mat L.S. can both grow different types of facial hair very quickly. And Sam, the mayor of New Windsor can grow his annual Santa Claus beard very quickly also. There is a nice lady clerk in the area who has a luxuriant black mustache. I always have wondered what she would look like if she shaved it off.

My late wife and I were fans of the Alligator Man and the Monkey Lady. They were a nice married couple who traveled around in so-called Freak Shows. When he put on a suit, he covered up his alligator skin and nobody knew about it; however, she had a full beard and mustache that could not have been hidden. Maybe she used a mask when she went out.

XM Radio broadcast a 1950's Twilight Zone radio show that involved masks. A family was visiting the patriarch of the family who was dying. They wanted to make sure they were in the will. (a little like the opera).. The family consisted of the father who was completely avaricious, the mother who was a hypochondriac, the daughter who was only concerned with her appearance, and the son, who was cruel to small animals and children.

The visit took place in New Orleans and the patriarch asked a Juju priest to make 4 masks for him. Now the patriarch told the family that if they kept their masks on until midnight, they would be able to share all of the money in his estate. Because they wanted the old man's money they agreed to do that. They did not in any way care for the old man.

The father got a mask that showed the face of a distorted Silas Marner or Ebenezer Scrooge. The mother got a mask that showed the face of cry baby. The girl's mask was of an ugly old woman. The boy's mask showed a cruel ogre. While not happy, they wore their masks until midnight, when the old man died.

The masks came off quickly and as they started to think about all the money they would now have, they found that their faces had taken on the looks of the masks and they would have to live with that for the rest of their lives.

Well.. got to go.. time to see what's happening on Facebook.

"Martha, who was that masked man?" "Why, it must have been The Lone Ranger.".. roll the tape of the William Tell overture.