I only have a little time to squeeze in some weird blog stuff. Let's see how much I can do in a half hour.
01. If "Diamonds are a Girl's Best Friend," why is a dog man's best friend? Doesn't sound equal to me.
02. Did I hear this right? A small town installed a traffic camera and took in over one million dollars during just the first month. (If true, there must be some kind of riot going on in that town.)
03. I heard that a 93 year old man died and his son found that he had many many magazine subscriptions that extended all the way to the year 2024. (One of our friends could never say "no" to the young folks who came to her door selling subscriptions.. when she died, she probably had lots of these long subscriptions as well.)
04. I saw mentioned in an article in the Nation magazine: Joseph Schumpeter paraphrased Lincoln: "Even if you cannot fool all of the people all of the time, you can fool enough people long enough to do irreversible damage."
05. Mark Twain said: "Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society."
(Burning question: During a nude wedding, where does the "best man" carry the ring? Also, at a nude wedding, is he really the "best man"? Sorry.)
06. A recent British study revealed that eating chocolate makes you smarter.
07. Moe Berg, famous baseball player was a linguist, speaking several languages, including Japanese. He led a very interesting life and when I have enough time, I'll write a blog entry about him.
08. American Profile magazine says that Joanne Brunet is famous for her collection of 4,000 packs of gum that she has saved over the last 68 years. The gum is stored in 112 cases. The oldest piece of gum was from 1932, Wrigley's Doublemint.
09. The Carroll Eagle magazine reports that the Hampstead, Maryland highway bypass has now been built. Local residents have waited 40 years for this day. Before the bypass, commuters had a driving nightmare. To satisfy environmentalists, the State Highway Agency had tunnels installed underneath the highway for bog turtles to use to cross, and are using goats to trim the grass, instead of taking a chance on mower blades striking the turtles. The bog turtles are an Endangered Species.
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2 comments:
1) Diamonds are only "valuable" because there's an artificial scarcity caused by the monopolistic corporation that owns most of the diamond producing assets in the world (DeBeers); dogs are, in fact, much more valuable.
2) It's probably on an interstate that goes through the center of town, and they get all the poor suckers from out-of-town.
3) I keep getting subscriptions I didn't order. The latest is for Outside magazine. Did you have anything to do with that?
4) This must be the anti-health-care-reform-lobby's motto.
5) I think of that African tribe that goes around naked except for a reed tied to the mens' genitals. It's there for decoration, of course, but one has to wonder if there's a competition to find the longest reed.
6) Ah, that explains it.
7) How do you say, "Hey Ump, get some glasses!" in Sanskrit?
8) Chewed or unchewed?
9) It takes a long time for turtle shells, damaged by mower blades, to heal. Howard Stern's wife does a lot of fundraising for a wildlife organization that helps, among other critters, turtles. He talked about how they glue the turtles shells back together when they have mower damage. I don't recommend using Elmer's glue, though. Do you think they finish it up with some turtle wax?
Chris, I have nothing to do with you getting "Outsider" magazine. I'm assuming it is a magazine for liberal thinkers and not for fly fishermen.
The woman with the gum collection has all unchewed sticks; however, she says she constantly has her gums working... so to speak. She must have massive jaw muscles.
Nice comments, son.
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